Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Seven Months!


Seven months ago, Jason and I were hitched! Can it really be more than half a year, already?!


I feel felt so naïve to have thought the first year would be a heavenly bliss of matrimony. I mean, hell-o, how could it not be? Jason and I had already known each other for three years and nine months before we got hitched. We’d lived together once for six months and then again for a year (so obviously the break in living together one time meant we had some issues to deal with and obviously we had tackled them, yes?). We were equals, so how could our first year be anything but ah-mazing.

I have been wrong. Not all the time wrong (I *really* dislike being wrong, btw) but every day with my new husband has not been a utopia of domestic bliss.

At times, hubs and I can be VERY different, but we do have a lot of the same values and ideals. We handle stress and everyday life differently, though. I am a talker and worrier and he is a thinker and more quiet. About three-four months into our new marriage, we started to argue. A lot. I think mostly because of how I handle stress (or rather don't handle it, lol) and because I sooo badly wanted us to become "one", merging bank accounts, having a plan (when will we have kids, should we buy a house, is he going back to school, where am I going for my BA, etc) and all that jazz; whereas J didn't mind if we did all these things but he wasn't in any immediate rush...he didn’t get my sense of urgency and I didn’t get his lack of it. We actually still have quite a bit of learning about each other to do (though I bet if J is reading this, he will naturally disagree with me)!

Marriage is work that I did not expect it to be. You can’t just break up if you have a bad fight and honestly you can’t always bitch and moan to your family or girlfriends, anymore. This isn’t just some jerky guy that you’re dating, anymore (not that Jason is/was a jerk but you get my point) This is the dude you vowed to spend the rest of your life with and so now your problems are…your problems and only the two involved can work it out. We have and we are, though. Hubs and I both don’t believe in divorce just because it gets….hard. So we’re in it for the long haul and because we know that, we have been able to work it out more, and more. I hate to admit it, but momma has been right (damn her!) and it does get better.

People can tell you their own experiences with their marriage, but until it is you, you won’t ever get "it" (at least I didn’t). But something else; as much as we have disagreed and argued throughout these newlywed months, I have also fallen so much more in love with him and I didn't think that was possible...so with the bad comes the good, too :) for us, anyway!

Happy seven months!



2 comments:

  1. I totally agree girl...my husband and i got married after 7 years together and 1 1/2 years living together...and it was still not the most perfect thing ever...but i think all relationships and marriages are going to be like that. I have heard the first year is the hardest but then you find your groove! happy 7 month anniversary!

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  2. Great post lovely! :) Hooray for seven months.

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